Obituary of Virginia Miller McCarthy
Virginia Miller McCarthy, 76, beloved mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, and friend, passed away on Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015, at her home in Aberdeen, after a long illness. Virginia was born and raised in Queens, NY, and graduated from Bishop McDonnell High School. She attended Fordham University, where she met her future husband, Daniel J. McCarthy Jr., while they worked together on a production of the play Harvey. After a whirlwind courtship, they married in September 1959, and moved to Aberdeen (then Matawan), NJ; in 1964. Virginia raised six children, volunteered in school libraries at St. Benedict School and St. John Vianney High School, and was a faithful fan of her children's and grandchildren's various sports, theater, and other activities. She also volunteered for the Aberdeen First Aid Squad, St. Benedict Church, Manna House, an organization that provides a home and skills training for mothers and their children, and several other organizations, as well as supporting friends when they were ill or otherwise in need. In recent years she has been a parishioner of St. Joseph Church in Keyport and found great comfort in being included on their prayer list during her illness. She loved family gatherings, her WomenChurch liturgy group, The New York Times crossword puzzle, cheering on the Mets, watching Jeopardy, reading books and newspapers, watching classic movies, attending theater productions, playing bridge with friends, and traveling the world, particularly places where she could attend tennis matches. She particularly enjoyed spending time with family in the summer on Lake Winnipesaukee, in New Hampshire. She was a wonderful cook and creator of beautifully decorated cakes, usually made from her Aunt Louise's recipe, with homemade pineapple filling. She was a strong believer in social justice, having her children participate in pickets and boycotts to aid the Farmworkers Movement, and encouraging progressiveness, equality of all people, and helping those in need. Above all, she had a big heart and a wise and generous spirit. Her early life was marked by the great sadness of losing her mother when Virginia was just eight, and she turned that sadness into great compassion for anyone going through difficult times. One of her many good friends described her as always providing a gentle presence and one of her son's wives lovingly called Virginia her 'fairy Godmother-in-law.' Virginia was predeceased by her parents, Anne Halliday Miller and Henry Bernard Miller, her beloved husband of 49 years, Dan, and her two sisters-in-law, Elizabeth McCarthy Daly and Adrienne Miller. She is survived by her children and their spouses, Deirdre and Dave Gelinne, Dan III and Melissa McCarthy, Justin and Tracy McCarthy, Anne and Steven Knight, Judith McCarthy and Mike Walsh, and Elizabeth McCarthy, and by her grandchildren, Daniel IV and his wife Lynda, Margaret and her husband Jesse, Christopher, Katherine, Brian, James, Caroline, Jared, Jack, Robbie, Thomas, Andrew, Harry, Olivia, Justin, and Elizabeth, as well as by her brother, Joseph Miller, her brother-in-law Robert Daly, her many nieces, nephews, great-nieces, great-nephews, and two baby great-great-nephews, in addition to her many friends. Her gentle presence and generous spirit will be terribly missed by all. Relatives and friends are invited to pay their respects from 2 to 4 p.m. and 7 to 9 p.m. Friday, Oct. 2 at Holmdel Funeral Home, 26 S. Holmdel Road, Holmdel. A memorial mass will be held at 10 a.m. Saturday, Oct. 3 at St. Joseph Church in Keyport. In lieu of flowers, please consider donations to the organization for which Virginia's daughter Elizabeth is the CEO: Sheltering Arms Children and Family Services, 305 Seventh Ave., NY, NY 10001 or online at ShelteringArmsNY.org.
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